This picture was taken a few days before we knew anything was wrong. So happy and pregnant!
March started just like the last few weeks and months. I was about 20 weeks pregnant and everything seemed to be going well. I had a relatively easy first trimester, I did not suffer from sever morning sickness but did struggle with constant headaches and exhaustion. Over all everything just felt right. Grant and I found out we were having a baby boy at 16 weeks and couldn’t have been more excited (we secretly had been hoping to have a boy first). I was getting bigger every day and more anxious than ever to meet our baby.
I had decided from the beginning that I wanted to have a natural birth and as minimal care as possible during this pregnancy. I ended up seeking care through a midwife with whom I met once a month to check general growth and talk about any concerns I had. It was around this time in March that my midwife suggested we have an anatomy scan done just to make sure that our baby boy was developing properly just as a precaution. Of course I had no real concerns, everything seemed to be moving along fine in my opinion; but we agreed to have it done.
My appointment was set up at a local hospital because my midwife did not do them herself. I had to go alone on the day of the ultrasound because Grant was very busy with school; I remember driving to the appointment so excited to see out little guy but wishing Grant could share the experience with me.
I checked in at the front desk and waited anxiously to be seen by the ultrasound tech. I hate being in hospitals, growing up they always felt so cold and unfriendly. I wanted this to be over as quickly as possible. Eventually, I was lead back to a small dark room and told to lie down on the table. The tech was very quite throughout the process, though she would point out certain things that were supposed to be important to me, like arms and legs. I couldn’t explain why, but after the first 20 minutes I started to get a feeling that something was wrong. The tech was taking an awfully long time and was taking a lot of pictures around my baby boys head. When she was finally done, she told me to wait in the room while she showed the pictures to the doctor who was working that day. I knew then that something had to be wrong; my appointment was supposed to be quick and easy and now she was checking with the doctor before she would let me leave!
She finally came back in the room, after what seemed like an eternity, and told me I was free to go and I should be hearing from my midwife shortly. I asked a few questions but she told me she wasn’t at liberty to answer any of them and that I should just wait to talk to my midwife. I left the hospital completely anxious and imagining all sorts of terrible things.
I didn’t hear from my midwife until the next morning, I had my phone glued to my hand for the last couple hours and answered as soon as I saw her number. She told me in a comforting way that my ultrasound had shown some abnormalities around our sons head and neck and that she wanted me to see a specialist to make sure that everything was OK She told me that she made an appointment for me the following day. I started crying when I heard that I would have to go a whole day before I could get any answers, the process already seemed to be taking so long!
To be continued…